Human life is full of sweet and bitter memories which fill its pages. Sometimes such things happen in our lives which leave us in total dilemma. We live in a society which we call ‘the modern era', but it is not different from that of those Arabs who before the arrival of Prophet Mohammad (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) used to bury their daughters alive on their birth. We too are doing the same i.e., foetal deaths, which are now a day to day affair. Though those Arab "Gawars" and "Jahils" were letting their daughters to take birth but we don't even wait for it. Our society still celebrates the birth of male child not less than any big festival and that of female child is being mourned like death.
Few days back, expecting a baby, I was admitted in a maternity hospital. My room was lying adjacent to the operation theater and I was able to hear a conversation of those who where waiting outside the theater for the arrival of the new comer (baby). As soon as the door was opened nobody asked whether the lady expecting a baby is alright or not. The only thing they was concerned with was the sex of the baby. Nobody bothered about the fair sex who was struggling between life and death. This attitude was hurting not only my body but also my sole as I was only thinking that perhaps same thing might happen to me tomorrow. The people on hearing that the woman inside the theater has given birth to a male baby used to cry with joy but they reduced to utter silence on hearing an otherwise news. The silence and cries of these people signified the sex of the new comer.
On hearing these cries and feeling that very silence, my helpless eyes were just gazing on the people around me, both from the parental and in-law side. Only the thing which was haunting me, not less than any nightmare, was that these people were also whishing to cry with joy. But if this wish would not be fulfilled then what would be their response. I too gave birth to a baby and same those very cries made my anesthetic being realize that I have given birth to male baby. From that very day I feel that my baby has filled my home with happiness. It is now much more happier place than it was before. But what concerns me is that this happiness should be for both sexes.
Lot is being said on gender equality, debates are being held, seminars are being conducted but no avail. All of us are having those same age old belief regarding this fair sex especially the women folk. Unless and until we won't change ourselves, no change can be expected by seminars or debates. We, the women hate our own gender. Whether she is a mother or a sister, she wishes that their son, brother, sister, daughter etc., should have only sons not daughters. Why this hatred? At present I was not in a position to pen down my thoughts but I couldn't resist because they were making me restless and sleepless.
Everybody among us accepts the fact that daughters are much more obedient than sons. It makes no difference to her whether it be her father or brother, she cares for them just like a mother. It is she who prays for their safe arrival back home, always cares for their big as well as little needs, but still we hate her, why?, even being killed in some cases. Quran gives the evidence of this in Sura Tawkeer: "For which sin she was killed" (81:9)
That your daughters on the Day of Judgment would ask you "for which sin she was killed". What would be our answer on that day when there will be no one to defend us. Only one thing which I as a daughter or as a sister wants to tell them who pray
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that they and their near ones should have only sons is that they are refusing to accept worlds most obedient and sincere creature i.e., a daughter. All of us should pray for an obedient and sincere children irrespective of their sex. Both should be welcomed with open arms. I salute those parents who accept both sexes in such a way.
It is sheer fruit of materialism which has drawn a line of demarcation. It shows our culture is devoid of moral and holistic values which stand solely enshrined in the natural revealed tenents.The world has tasted the bitter fruit. We should seek eternal solace in the Qur'an and the practical life of Prophet Muhammad (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam). Our restlessness will not annihilate unless we submit to this ‘Aabi Hayaat' whole heartedly.
NUZHAT(SHUBEE)